Wednesday, 1 May 2013

1st May 1933 - Mary to Terrick


May 1st 1.00

Am seized with hopeless & quite uncontrollable depression - mostly , I expect, because I've got a stupefying headache. - & also my last letter was so stupid & infantile that I keep on worrying about what you're beginning to think of me - oh heavens, isn't this stupid -

But I do wish I was back again sitting on top of that hill - all by myself with the wind in my head blowing my thoughts into the wrong places - & you playing hide-and-seek with the children at the bottom -

- and I do so wish you'd come back - so that I could remember what you're like - instead of imagining a hopeless sort of person who is just 'somebody-to-write-to' -

Oh - I've completely forgotten - why can't you - or somebody else - anybody - come back?

- This place is unbearable - & it's all my own fault

- Why can't I stay sensible always?

- Love Mary (HORRIBLY UNpleasant)

(It'll pass 'she's often like this!')

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